


Tony Stark Hates Magic featuring Toddler Steve

by Nowherewoman42



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Crack, De-Aged Steve Rogers, Fluff, Magic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:48:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27650240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nowherewoman42/pseuds/Nowherewoman42
Summary: Steve is turned into a toddler and Tony is not amused.
Relationships: Steve Rogers & Avengers Team, Steve Rogers & Tony Stark
Kudos: 30





	Tony Stark Hates Magic featuring Toddler Steve

**Author's Note:**

> I love de-aged stories so I thought I'd try and write one.

Tony hated mad scientists. A month ago they had invade New York with sentient jello cubes, now they had somehow turned Steve into a toddler. “Steve you have a shield, you should use it.” The scientist chided once it became clear that the direct hit Steve had taken had only had the one ill effect.

The child-Steve just looked up in confusion.

“Of course, you don’t understand me. You’re what, 2? Great. Just great. I should not be allowed to babysit. Ask Pepper! Ask the media! I don’t need to be in charge of children.”

Steve looked toward him and held his arms up towards Tony. “Up!” The child demanded.

Tony sighed. The kid was adorable with big blue eyes, blonde curls, and oversized uniform. “Okay kid, up you go.” Tony then scooped up the little boy.

“Yay!” The boy cheered as he was lifted up.

Tony made his way back to the rest of the team.

“Man of Iron! It is good to see you arrive unharmed!” Thor boomed as Tony entered the quin-jet. “Where is our Captain?” The Asgardian inquired.

Tony shifted his arms so Steve was facing the others. “We ran into a little problem, and now he is a little problem.”

“That’s Steve?” Clint asked incredulously.

“Yep. Today’s nutcase managed to make him shrink.”

“Aww he’s kinda cute.” Bruce said taking the child from Tony. “We should find him some clothes. He probably isn’t too comfortable in the stealth suit.”

“Hey little fella, want to go play with my son Nate?” Clint said poking Steve in the stomach playfully earning a laugh from the blonde.

“At least he is a happy kid.” Natasha chimed in.

“Yeah, his “fight me” attitude didn’t come in until kindergarten.” Bucky replied.

Tony couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “So no one is at all concerned that Steve is barely eating solid food?”

“Calm down Tony, we’ll fix it. But you have to admit, for all of the ways our missions have gone wrong, this is a pretty fun one.”

“Fun for you! My boyfriend is a toddler! Oh god that sounded awful.” Tony said rubbing his temple. Natasha was right though, Steve seemed fine; he was happily playing with Bucky’s metal arm.

“Hey Barnes, who would have guessed a hydra weapon would be a great teething ring.” Clint laughed as Steve began chewing on Bucky’s hand.

“Ha ha, very funny Barton. Maybe you can let him use you as a chew toy.” Bucky retorted, but he was smiling at the child and didn’t move away.

“Friday, scan Steve, see what’s going up with him?” Tony said, ignoring what was going on.

“Mr. Rogers has a slight temperature, but is otherwise fine.”

Bucky frowned. “If he was de-aged do you think it undid the serum? Like he will start to get sick again like when we were kids?”

Tony felt his anxiety levels rise again. “I don’t know. I don’t even know how this is possible.”

“Even if he does, we have better medicine now, he should be fine.” Bruce answered.

Thor approached the boy. “Hello young one. Thor put his hand on the boys head. “I detect magic, not Midgardian science.”

“Of course.” Tony groaned. If he hated one thing more than mad scientists, it was mad wizards who pretended to be mad scientists.

“My brother may be of service to us. He should be able to undo the spell and restore our comrade to full size.”

The team shared glances, but all realized that there was not really another option so Tony responded. “Okay Thor, you should go fetch Loki once we get back to Stark Tower. How long do you think it will take to find him?”

“Not long, brother is back on New Asgard. I should return by morning.”

“Thanks Thor.” Tony responded. The team began to disembark the plane as they landed.

“So we get to be baby sitters for tonight. That’s fun. Let’s go get Steve some toys.”

“Toys!” The little boy piped up.

“Clothes first, it’s too cold for him to be naked.” Bruce remarked as Steve climbed down from the seat and slipped out of his oversized jacket.

“Ha, Steve is going to flip when we get him back to normal and he finds out he was nude in front of the entire team.”

Tony scooped him up and wrapped him in a blanket, feeling better knowing this was only a temporary state. “Yeah he will be as red as my suit for hours.”

The team entered Stark Tower and sent out an intern for a few toys and baby clothes, under the guise of a visiting cousin of Tony’s. They returned and handed one bag to Tony and then left. “Alright Steve, let’s get you dressed.” Tony quickly pulled the blonde into a blue striped onesie and then carried him and sat him in the middle of the team on a waiting blanket.

“Here you go Steve, it’s a dinosaur, like you.” Natasha said as she handed off a plush dino.

“Thank you.” Steve said and squeezed the gift.

A quick camera flash startled the blonde and Tony and Natasha turned to see Bucky holding his phone. “Blackmail.” He responded, showing a picture of the blonde mid dinosaur hug.

Tony was surprised how well things were going the team turned on a kid friendly movie, popped some popcorn and let Steve just sort of hang out. Clint laid on the floor and pushed around toy cars with the boy and Bruce found him some crayons and paper to color, which seemed to be Steve’s favorite. It was kind of neat, Tony thought, that Steve had always been the little artist.

Just then Thor returned with a loud bang. The God of Thunder was gripping his brother Loki tightly. “I have returned comrades! My brother has agreed to help our friend Steve!”

Loki approached Steve. “Hello little one. I’m going to give you a hand.” He tapped Steve on the head with his scepter and there was a bright light and a loud bang.

When everyone’s eyes readjusted they were treated to a very confused looking Steve, standing in the center of the room in an adult-sized version of his toddler onesie.

“What is going on?” Steve asked taking in the group in front of him and his own clothing. 

Tony let out a sigh of relief. “Oh you had a little regression and we had to treat you like a toddler instead of a grandpa. Don’t worry, we only took a few photos and you were only briefly nude.”

Steve blushed which only made the team burst out laughing. Steve rubbed the back of his neck. Oh well, his life was bizarre anyway.


End file.
